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Merchant of Venice, I4r

Editorial note

This appropriation of I4r of Shakespeare’s Merchant of Venice is inspired by the hit Bravo reality TV series Vanderpump Rules. Vanderpump Rules was created by Lisa Vanderpump, successful restaurateur and TV personality. Lisa is the owner of SUR restaurant, and the show follows the drama of her staff, mainly as they engage in tumultuous relationships with one another. Merchant of Venice’s I4r is the height of conjoined conflicts between two couples, Gratiano (Gratzi) & Nerissa (Ner) and Bassiano (Bass) & Portia (Port). This historic confrontation filled with tension, argument, and betrayal is so reminiscent of an episode of Vanderpump Rules, that it seemed obvious to put the two pieces of media into conversation. 

The following appropriation is styled as an excerpt from a transcript of an episode of Vanderpump Rules. The diction has been altered to reflect 21st century, mid-2000s specifically, California millennials. The initial argument between Ner & Gratzi is reflective of the relationship between Stassi Shroeder and Jax Taylor (at least, back when they were dating in season 1 of the show). Stassi is a server at SUR and Jax is a bartender. Stassi is known for her sharp wit and temper. She often confronts Jax in confrontation but also finds ways to go behind Jax's back to determine his trustworthiness (or lack thereof). Similarly, in this scene Portia and Bassiano are translated in the style of Katie Maloney and Tom Schwartz. Throughout the show, Tom does not have a job, and Katie supports him with her job as a server at Sur. Despite this fact among other glaring red flags, Katie is a strong defender of Tom until evidence shows otherwise. Also notable is the strong bromance in the show. Tom and Jax always might rat on each other when one of them messes up, but they will almost always choose their guy friends over their romantic relationships.  Additions are threaded through the translation that directly references the relationships of the reality show couples, while also demonstrating the similarities between the characters.

NERISSA 

Gratzi… You’re not GETTING IT. It doesn’t matter if it costs less than your botched nose 1or more than a whole year’s worth of bartending shifts. It’s that you don’t LISTEN when I talk. When I gave you the ring I told you how important it was that you KEEP it and you even swore you’d take it to your grave. So honestly, you giving away your ring to a busser at PUMP2 just goes to show you don’t keep your word. You’re a liar.3 I bet the busser you gave it to didn’t even have a beard…

 

GRATIANO

I mean, I’m sure he’ll have one in a few years Ner, he’s just a busser anyways give him a break.

 

NERISSA

Yeah, maybe if women start growing beards…

 

GRATIANO

Ner! I gave the shitty ring to a kid, it’s not like I got a girl pregnant in Vegas,4come on now. Just a busser boy he was like your height and he did me a solid and that’s what he wanted. I couldn’t be a dick and leave him hanging.

 

PORTIA

Gratzi you are such a dick! That was like a promise ring. Ner gave that ring to you as, like, a really meaningful first gift. It’s like a sign of trust. I gave Bass a ring too- not just a ring on a string5 - but one on his finger that he promised to keep there forever. And like look at him, he wouldn’t give up his ring for all of Lisa’s riches.6 You’re such a scumbag Gratzi- if I was Ner, I’d be pissed.

 

BASSANIO

Cut to Bass’ confessional.7

Well, fuck at this point I should probably just cut of my finger and say I lost it in a fight with some dude at the bar last night or something. 8

 

GRATIANO

Uh, bad news Port, noble Bass here gave his ring away too. But, to the PUMP bartender that asked him for it. And like, he totally deserved it. Then the busser who was bar backing for him and totally played a huge part in helping us out. Like we offered them free drinks if they came into SUR, but NO, they wanted the rings.

 

PORTIA

Um, Bass, what the fuck is he talking about? He definitely doesn’t mean you gave MY ring away to some bartender, DID YOU?

 

BASSANIO

Ugh, Port I’m not gonna fuck this up and lie to you more. It’s gone, okay? Look at my finger.

Image credit: Rare Books & Manuscripts Department, Boston Public Library, copy G.176.16. The most excellent historie of the merchant of Venice. First Quarto. London: 1600.

Citing this page: Shakespeare, William. The Merchant of Venice, I4r. London: 1600. Cacodemon Digital Shakespeare. Edited by Adelyne Reynolds. Source edition: Rare Books & Manuscripts Department, Boston Public Library (copy G.176.16). http://cacodemonshakespeare.com/comedies/merchant/i4r.

Vanderpump Rules. Created by Ryan Stiles, Bravo, 2013–2025

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Notes

  1. Most of the characters on Vanderpump Rules engage in frequent Botox. Jax has had three nose jobs in addition to dozens of other elected plastic surgeries
  2. PUMP is another of Lisa Vanderpump’s West Hollywood restaurants. Additionally, a busser is one of the lower paying jobs within a restaurant.
  3. This outright accusation is constantly thrown at Jax. His word means nothing as he is constantly shown saying one thing, then immediately doing the opposite. Especially in the context of romantic relationships; he is unfaithful and rarely keeps his word.
  4. There is a rumor for most of season 1 that Jax cheated on Stassi and it is confirmed in the season finale that he did, in fact, cheat on her and get a woman pregnant on a trip to Las Vegas.
  5. The phrase “ring on a string” comes from season 3 episode 16 of Vanderpump Rules when Tom gifts his girlfriend of 5 years, Katie a ring on a string, rather than the proposal that she has been practically begging for.https://youtube.com/shorts/r0Tg61pFfjs?si=kFMTzBiTBtTAzIF_
  6. Lisa Vandepump's wealth is a focal point of the show, with her mansion, complete with a moat and swans, often featured
  7. As in most popular reality shows, the series integrates confessional interviews with the cast and inserts them throughout the episodes. The individuals address the drama as it is happening, separate from the rest of the cast.
  8. Throughout the show, the boys sport injuries from countless bar fights.
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